Here we GOOOOOOOO!!!
The episode picks right back up with Crazy Kelsey on the ground being treated with oxygen. As she is doing this she is joking with the paramedic and says “I’d better get a rose for this!” and then asks for Chris to come and comfort her.
When she is “better” she comes back super animated and giggly and explains to the girls what had happened. And none of them are buying it. Instead, they’re pissed.
Crazy Kelsey then says in an interview, “I am THE women he is going to fall in love with and marry. And today is the day that signifies the start of it all.”
Fast-forward to the rose ceremony (continuation from last week) and he gives MacNosie and some brunette we’ve barely seen the boot. Awwwww.
There are now nine girls left and they are taken to Deadwood, a little wild wild west town. And one of the first things we see is Crazy Kelsey and Britt having a convo out on the balcony in which Crazy Kelsey says, ” I want a one-on-one, I feel like I have earned it! Ba-ha-ha!”” And Britt is on the balcony just wearing sweatpants and a bra. No shirt. That is not normal. She is wearing a bra for all to see. #Whereisthedecency.
The first one-on-one date is with Becca and they go horseback riding. There’s not much to say about this date except that they do enjoy each other. It’s pretty “normal.” Later that night as they are roasting skewers on the fire, they seem to be very genuine with one another. So much so that we hear a plethora of Chris’ funny laugh, which Becca is not shy to point out. He gives Becca the rose and then they do a little quick smooch, but Becca is the one who goes in for the kill. And it’s sweet.
Fast-forward back to the girl’s house and Whitbird, Mileymouth and Carly are sitting on the couch bashing Crazy Kelsey and decide it is time to speak up. So when she comes into the room she is immediately confronted and she plays it off WELL. She talks about the respect and admiration she has for these women and she would never mean to upset anyone. She claims she will do her best to be more mindful, but then to the camera says she came here to “win it.” #liarliar
Fast-forward to the group date and the girls are going to be writing a love song to Chris and performing it to him with the help from Big and Rich, a couple of big-time country stars.
Some are ecstatic, like Carly the Cruise Ship Singer, but some think this is horrifying, like Touche Jade.
Touche Jade gets s a little pep talk from one of the country stars and she is finally feeling good about herself….. until she looks over and sees Chris with his lips locked with Britt’s as they lovingly embrace one another. #completelynormalsituation
And YEAH! That would BLOW! Can you imagine? Pouring your heart into a love song only to look over at your guy caressing another model-esque woman?
I think I’d be a basket case. Or a bitch. Not sure which.
The girls perform and some do well and some don’t, but they all do it and it’s fun. But of course, Carly BLOWS these girls out of the water with her song that she sings RIGHT at Chris’ face. And now I want to sing at MY husband! I wonder how that would go…
“I Love you Baby….yes I do.
I love you Baby…. how about you?”
Eew. I would never call him “baby.” That is just weird.
Fast-forward to the evening portion of the date and Chris takes a little time with all of the girls except for Britt. He saves this one for last and tells her that he has a surprise for her.
And instead of a normal chat session he takes her out of the building and they run away to another location where there is a Big and Rich concert going on and they rock it on stage with them as he gives her a rose.
And this whole time the other girls are back at the bar…. waiting.
FOR OVER AN HOUR!
And they are NOT happy about it, either.
Now, I agree with them, here. Chris should NOT have done this. Send them back to the hotel. Then sneak out and take Britt back out if you want. But don’t keep them waiting. #ra-hude
They finally walk back in, hand-in-hand, and it couldn’t be more awkward.
A lot of staring at the floor. Staring at her rose. And Chris tries to lighten their spirits by saying “today was still fun!” but no.
Not breaking the bad mood.
So he gets up and leaves Britt to handle the wrath of the wolves.
Total cowardly move.
She does her best to answer their questions and handle them all, but it just results in tears and attitude.
I really can’t blame Britt for this one, here. Why wouldn’t she go off with him?
Fast-forward to the two-on-one date and it is between Crazy Kelsey and Ashley from the Block. And we know there is going to be some sort of goodness here because of the two women on this date. I mean….
The date begins and they hop on a helicopter and go to The Badlands in South Dakota. On this date there is this pool party-esque cabana set up in the middle of practically the desert on a windy day next to another woman.
Misery? I am thinking misery here.
Ashley from the Block has some time first with him and decides it’s a good idea to tell Chris how manipulative Crazy Kelsey is and how she doesn’t get along with anyone.
Chris says he appreciates her telling him this and shortly after does the swap and has some time with Crazy Kelsey.
And the first thing he does is TELL her what Ashley from the Block JUST told him.
I mean DEEE-Ra-Ma!
She responds in a very “hurt” manner saying she thought she could trust Ashley and defends her case, of course. She walks back to the cabana where Ashley from the Block is sitting and is fierce.
And finally. after what feels like a good three minutes, she says in the creepiest way possible…
The bantering back and forth ensues before Ashley from the Block finally gets up and walks away. She goes to find Chris and is a crying mess. She asks him why he told her what she said and he apologizes. But she makes him recant word for word what was said And she bawls.
So he decides to send her home! He tells her that he doesn’t think she would be happy with his lifestyle and she replies with, “Oh so you think BRRRRITT!! wants that lifestyle? Seriously? Are you kidding me?”
And she is just one big crying, hysterical woman. She can’t even form sentences.
Fast-forward back to the hotel and Ashley from the Block’s suitcase is removed from the room letting everyone know she got the boot and they are in shock and tears are shed.
Fast-forward back to the awful date and Chris then goes down to where Crazy Kelsey is on the cabana. She hugs him and tells him that what he just let go “is a loss” and he doesn’t waste any time in telling her that she too, is a goner…
She doesn’t argue with him to his face, just sheds a few tears, and then Chris gets into the helicopter and LEAVES and we are shown the two girls sitting by themselves in the middle of dirt. Then to the camera, Crazy Kelsey leaves us with “My story is amazing. It is tragic. and it is inspiring. And it is beautiful. I am immeasurably blessed.”
Except the previews for tonight? Ugh. So good. MUST. WATCH.
Thanks for following along with me!
Who is your top pick at this point? Is it who you think is best suited for Chris, or who you think will just “win?”