Lies, Letters and Dirty Lads- Bachelorette Recap 6

The episode starts out in Venice and it looks absolutely incredible.

Andi starts out the episode by announcing that the first one-on-one date begins right away. Everyone expects it to go to I Kiss My Own Muscles, Cody since he is the only one who hasn’t been on one yet, but instead it goes to Nick.

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I Kiss My Muscles, Cody is hurt and says he feels “like the pet dog of the group” and I feel sad for him. I don’t think he is going much further, but I still feel for his little feelings, anyway.

Andi and Nick begin the date by exploring the city, eating some yummy food and feeding the nasty pigeons.

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They cruise around the city  in one of those cute little boats and Nick can’t wait to talk to Andi about what a salty loser he was on the last group date. He explains himself and she eats it up.

Fast-forward back to the house and the group date card arrives, and Cody’s name is not read so that means he gets the next one-on-one. ossh Cubin seems excited for his little buddy and gives him the “You did it, Little Guy! face.” And then I Kiss My Muscles Cody does his own happy dance.

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Fast-forward back to the one-on-one with Nick and they smoochie smooch all over the water and Nick tells the camera that they are “back” to how they used to be.

At dinner they talk about how some of the other guys have duped Nick as they guy who can’t get along and he exclaims that Andi is his priority, not the other guys. He then tells her he is falling in love with her and she is done-in. Andi reflects and says if she ends up with Nick she could look back someday and say Venice is where she fell in love with him.

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The next day Andi gets another note from her secret admirer and is all smiles.

Fast-forward to the group date and everyone will be taking a lie-detector test, and when they hear of this there is not a smile in the room. In fact, they look like they could vomit.

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Josh seems REAL nervous about the test. He asks “how correct are these machines” and if they’d be able to explain themselves after each question.

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Uhhh, no. LIAR!

I am still waiting for his girlfriend to come on the show.

He keeps complaining how this whole thing is invading their trust.

The men then take the test and are asked questions like “Are you here for the right reasons?” “Have you slept with more than twenty women?” “Are you good in bed?” and “Do you wash your hands after you use the bathroom?” which are quite entertaining.

Chris the Friend Zone Farmer  then reveals in the lie detector test that he is the secret admirer and that he is upset that he has to reveal that he is the one in a test.

In case you were wondering, Dirty Hands Dylan was the one who slept with over 20 women and who doesn’t wash his hands after using the bathroom. He left that test in shame (hiding is dirty mitts) and claimed he was “sick” and went home.

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They get the test results and we hear that Andi lied about thinking everyone there is there for the right reasons. She then rips up their test results and I want to punch her in the boob. That would have created a LOT more drama, damnit.

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During the evening portion of the date Black-eyed Brian pulls her aside first and creates his own lie-detector test with her and takes the initiative to kiss her, which she likes. I think Black-eyed Brian is becoming my front-runner, here.

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The guys then talk about who the admirer is and to not blow his cover, Chris the Friend Zone Farmer agrees with the bunch how stupid the whole idea is, though he looks quite uncomfortable in saying so.

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Chris then pulls Andi aside and starts to tell her that he is “the one” and right away she knows. She seems really happy that it is him and he said telling her was one of the best experiences of his life as he cusps her buttox and makes out with her. In return, she gives him the group date rose.

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As soon of the guys are congratulating Chris on getting the rose, JJ I Sew Pants steps up and says that they all shouldn’t be doing such a thing and that he’s tired of celebrating other’s successes. The guys pounce on him about it, especially Chris the Friend-Zone Farmer, and I yell, “Yay! Go Chris the Friend-Zone Farmer!”

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Fast-forward to Andi and I Kiss My Own Muscles, Cody’s date and they experience Verona. And I am not digging Andi’s turtleneck, skort and shoe-wedges, or shwedges.

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They go to where Romeo and Juliet originated and read some of the letters that are sent there every year. Cody replies to some poor chap and puts his own relationship with Andi into his response.

There is just NO chemistry between Andi and I Kiss My Own Muscles, Cody and they are definitely just friend-zone material.

But, at dinner, I Kiss My Own Muscles, Cody thinks otherwise and goes over-the-top in expressing his feelings for Andi with his super-low v-neck suit ( I didn’t even know such a thing existed) and she sits there like a sick puppy in silence. In fact, she’e even frowning. She even starts crying and he STILL goes on and on.

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FINALLY she interrupts him and breaks it to him that all they have is a friendship. She tells him that she has way too much respect for him and that she won’t be taking him to next week. She walks him out in tears.

Fast-forward to the cocktail party and Nick, who already has a rose, pulls her aside first and no one likes that business and they let him know it.  Nothing else that exciting happens… she kisses just about all of them…

She ends up sending home JJ I Sew Pants and I am a bit surprised by this! I expected her to send home Dirty Hands Dylan. She talks to him before he leaves and basically tells him she doesn’t see herself being weird with him, but that she appreciates his weirdness.

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The end!

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Comments

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